Posted in Poetry

Space

There’s an itch
At the very back of my head 
“I did something wrong”
“It’s my fault” 

I am 
Terrified 
Of rejection

And now, 
It’s staring me in the face

Messages unread
Unanswered
Only my bubbles to fill the gap

I’ve tried again
“Maybe I’m overthinking it” 
“It was just bad timing” 
But at some point
It becomes pointless

Too scared
To ask
To confront
Too scared of rejection

So the itch remains
“I was too clingy” 
“Too pushy” 
“Annoying” 

“Maybe it all meant nothing” 
“I didn’t pay enough attention”

“I overshared” 
“Didn’t listen” 

Texts remain unanswered
The itch growing stronger
An added ache in my stomach

I think I’ll just give up now
Space
That’s the answer

A void
A gap
Space

It hurts

The itch remains
Egged on by my fear
Maybe my pride
“I won’t text first” 

… *hiddengirl75 is typing*

Until we meet again…stay safe ❤

~hiddengirl75

P.S. Featured Image by 愚木混株 Cdd20 from Pixabay

Posted in Poetry

Homesick

I’m sick
For my second home
It’s not a place but rather people
Memories that I’ve made 
With the kids, I knew in 2nd grade

I miss the smiles and the laughter
The events that felt like an escape
I remember everything quite fondly
Even the moments that made me want to run away

There’s a warmth that I’ve associated with them
A feeling that I’ve longed for
Smiles that felt like hugs and yet,
Old pictures make me feel sick
An emptiness inside
Making me want to cry

I dream about meeting up
Imagining interactions
Fond recounts
And catching up

But when I run into them
It’s awkward
I run away
Or shift, stand and smile
Conversations do not flow
Like I had hoped
But rather my words get jumbled
No longer do they feel like home

So I retreat 
To my memories
Where they still feel like home
And dream of the times
Smiles were hugs

~hiddengirl75

P.S. I have a Talk Story blog post coming out soon for a tag I was nominated to do, and I’m sorry it’s taking me so long to do it but school has been draining my creativity :/

So, I hope you enjoy this poem that came from a burst of creativity and nostalgia. 💕

Posted in Poetry

Returning to the Past

I would like to go back
To when things didn't matter
When exactly was that? 
I can't seen to remember

Laughter and make believe magic
When was that real?
I remember the time vaguely
Why can't I feel?

I wish to return 
And never come back
Because simplicity and smiles
Are a thing of the past

When magic was real
And laughter rang free
That's where I'd like to return to 
Please 

A simple request
Yet impossible to confess
As responsibility is present tense

~ hiddengirl75

P.S. The featured image is not my photo, I found it on Pinterest.

Posted in Poetry

Lonely and Waiting

Staring at my phone
In isolation
Waiting for something...anything...

A ring
A ping
Any sound at all

The screen remains blank
The room remains silent
Nothing...silence...blank

Alone
In isolation
No company at all

~ hiddengirl75

Posted in Poetry

Holding On

Remembering something I want to never forget
May it be secrets or smiles
My wish is to never forget them

I am holding onto something
That I never intend to let go of
The secrets, the smiles, the never ending story
I hold them to me

These are the things I don't ever want to let go of
These are the memories I shall never forget 
They shall remain until the end of time

~ hiddengirl75

P.S The featured image is not my image, found on Google.

Posted in Poetry

High School Relationships

High school relationships 
Now that's something 
I'd never do

The drama
And clinging
Just makes me want to go,
EWW

Friends disappear
For days at a time
And come running back
When they've got a problem on their mind

The tears and break-ups 
That's a normal thing
But seriously in high school
Everyone seems to just want a fling

Now let me tell you 
Something I'd never do
Relationships in high school. 

I had a lot of fun with this poem. Please don’t get offended if you are in a high school relationship. This is just how I view relationships at my school.

~ hiddengirl75

Posted in Poetry

Taking A Breath

Taking a breath
Getting ready to scream
 
The pain building up
And starting to scheme
 
The anger and frustration
Piling up inside
Fighting to find a way into the bright light
 
One small scrape or a cut
And then it’s all over
As the anger seeps out
And the shell of yourself starts to roar
 
It’s having to hide it all
That really hurts the most
Having to laugh and smile
While holding in the ghost
 
It really builds up 
As your friends find no holes
In the shell of yourself
That holds no hosts
 
So get ready
Take that breathe
And scream
For all your frustrations need to let off some steam
 
And soon the time will come when you take the leap
Finding that your pain needs to be seen
Seeking out help 
And finding great friends
That love and support you until the very end

~ hiddengirl75

Posted in Poetry

Pain

Pain is a feeling
That flows through your veins
 
It is caused by fretting 
Over people who couldn’t care less
And the stress
That messes with your head
 
It is the deep ache inside
That needs to be fixed
But who has the time
To stop and find the rest
That is needed to tape up the whole in my chest
 
Pain is the feeling
That you get 
When you’re broken and hunched over
With all your regrets
 
It is what lives inside you 
And dares you to fix
Knowing that nothing 
Will mend your broken bits

~ hiddengirl75

Posted in Poetry

Opinionated

To say 
I'm not very opinionated 
To start with
Is not the truth
 
I have much to say 
But words escape me
 
My mind goes blank 
And I hold my tongue
 
Assuming things
You fill the blanks
And say
Well you're not very opinionated to begin with
 
But you've only seen
A part of me
 
A part that's grown
Or better yet,
Shrunk
 
As school has taught me 
To hold my tongue.

~ hiddengirl75

~☆~☆~☆~☆~☆~☆~

A Piece of Wisdom

Speak your mind, even if your voice shakes.

Maggie Smith
Posted in Poetry

Midnight boredom

Oh so bored
Sitting in silence 
The clock ticking 
Pen scratching
Paper flapping
My own beating
 
Thumps 
So loud and clear
A pounding 
That resonates 
Ever so near
 
Thoughts that collide
At the fastest of speeds
 
Penned words 
Glaring back at me
Underlined and bolded
Ever so carefully 
 
Merging together
Problems and thoughts,
future and past,
hopes and dreams.
 
Leaving me behind
Bored and bleeding.

~ hiddengirl75